I’m not a teacher (yet) but I do work with students and one of them had the nerve to look me dead in the eye and ask me “why would it be a bad idea for me to eat this entire marker?” They’re 11
An 4th grader asked for a high five by saying, “A little slappy to make daddy happy?”
I did not give him a high five.
A student during break had her head in her arms and was shaking a bit, so i asked the kid next to her whether she was laughing or crying and this 8 year old stared me in the eye deadpan and said “im crying on the inside”
Wait i take that back, I cant believe i forgot about the time i brought in a small stuffed octopus as a class mascot because why tf not. It was a class of high schoolers and i didnt imagine theyd actually care much, but one student snuck in a snack and gave it to the octopus as a tribute. Which led to other students doing the same thing, until every day there was a pile of of offerings to Fweej the Overseer, mostly consisting of things like string cheeses and small bags of chips, but sometimes there wouldd be a couple bucks in quarters, one kid brought in some giant pocky i think, and at one point there was a cold stone gift card. This stuffed octopus gained a cult following.
Later i brought in another stuffed octopus that looked exactly the same but bigger and told the class that Fweej the Overseer accepted their offerings and became stronger. These highschoolers lost their goddamn minds.
So Ive been going through the notes of this post and it seems Fweej the Overseer is pretty popular with tumblr as well. So I dug through facebook and found photos for yall. Special thanks to @sakoyo, who was my TA and made the facebook posts, thus keeping the record and immortalizing his legacy.
Fweej lives on 🙌🐙🙌
you started a cult to a tentacled entity with a name not matching the orthography of any human language. Congrats on becoming the villain of a pulp fantasy story.
I was a professional juggler for like five years and all of my friends politely pretend it never happened.
Sometimes I will be holding three or more similarly sized objects and they will all shoot me the kind of warning glances typically reserved for cats who are about to swipe a fresh and crispy fish stick from a small child’s hand.
I gaze wistfully at a basket of apples and they all think, “Don’t you FUCKING dare,” so hard that I take psychic damage.
Physically unable to stop thinking about that time in 2010 that Tom Hiddleston thought Chili’s was an authentic Mexican eatery and invited the cast of Thor to go eat there with him. I think about it every day of my life
it’s just that there are so many LEVELS to this fuckup. MAYBE if he had never been to america before and thought on the outside that chili’s was authentic it’d be ok, but he went in. BY HIMSELF. ATE A LONELY MEAL AT CHILI’S. WAS GREETED BY THE WAITSTAFF. OPENED A MENU THAT HAS “CHICKEN CRISPERS” AND “BEER CHEESE WITH PRETZELS” ON IT. ATE SOMETHING FROM THIS MENU. LEFT. WENT TO SET LATER AND TOLD THE ENSEMBLE CAST OF THOR TO MEET HIM AT CHILI’S. DID HE INVITE ANTHONY HOPKINS? DID HE INVITE ANTHONY HOPKINS TO CH
